Janis: Little Girl Blue (2015)

1
I sing.
Why do you sing?
Well, because,
um, I get to experience
a lot of feelings.
It's really a lot of fun.
You get to feel
all kinds of things
that you could hardly find if
you went to parties all year
round and made it with
everyone you ever wanted to
because you get to feel things
that are in your imagination
and another end of truth.
That's why I like music
because it's created from
and as it's happening
creates feelings.
What could I feel if I
attended your concert tonight?
I'd like you
to feel like standing up
and jump up and down
in time with the music
and get sweaty and
just go with the music.
Just go with it.
Like, rock and
roll's very rhythmic.
That's what it's all about.
You know, it's 1,2, 3, 4.
Yeah, you thought you had
found yourself a good
girl, one who would love
you and give you the world.
Then you find, hun, that
you've been misused.
Look at me, honey.
I'll do what you choose.
I want you to, well,
tell Mama all about it.
Yeah, tell Mama.
What do you need?
Tell your Mama, babe.
What you want?
Tell your Mama, babe.
What do you need?
What do you want?
What do you need?
What do you want?
I'll make everything all right.
I'll tell ya.
When you get lonely... and I
figure everybody does, now,
because as a matter of
fact, everybody does... I'll
tell you what you need, baby.
When you get those strange
thoughts in your head,
you don't know where
they came from,
man, you've got those
strange little weirdness
that's happening to you.
You don't know what they are.
I'll tell you what you need.
You need a sweet-loving
mama, baby.
Hun, a sweet-talking
mama, babe, you
know, someone to listen to you,
someone to want you, someone
to hold you, someone to need
you, someone to use you,
someone to want you, someone
that needs you, someone
to hold you.
You need a mama, mama, mama,
babe, a mama, ma, ma, ma.
Yeah, mama, mama, mama, ma mama.
Tell Mama all about it.
Tell Mama all about it.
What do you need?
What do you want?
Anything I can do,
anything I can do,
I'll be your mama, babe,
yeah, your mama, babe,
oh, mama, babe, oh, mama, babe,
oh, mama, babe, oh, mama, babe.
I'll make everything all right.
Dear family, I managed
to pass my 27th birthday
without really feeling it.
Oh, it's such a funny game.
Two years ago, I didn't
even want to be it.
No, that's not true.
I've been looking around,
and I've noticed something.
After you reach a certain level
of talent... and quite a few
have that talent...
The deciding factor
is ambition or, as I see it,
how much you really need,
need to be loved and need
to be proud of yourself.
And I guess that's
what ambition is.
It's not all a depraved
quest for position or money.
Maybe it's for love,
lots of love, ha, Janice.
Port Arthur, to a lot of people,
it was a really good
town to grow up in.
I never thought so.
Janice never thought
so, and she couldn't
figure out how to make
herself like everybody else,
thank goodness.
Our parents,
I'm not exactly sure
how they actually
met, but they started
dating after Mother had gone
away to college and come back
and started working.
Daddy was a mechanical
engineer, but he
was able to get a job
because at that time,
so many people
were away fighting.
So he got a job at
Texaco, and he stayed
there his entire working life.
And he came home from work
one day and told mother,
let's do something
for posterity.
So that's Janis
being born in 1943.
So that's Janis
being born in 1943.
She joined the choir,
and they kicked her
out of the choir.
She wouldn't follow directions,
and they said, you're out.
Like most women, Janis
wanted to be beautiful
and curvaceous and skinny
like the pictures that
she saw in magazines.
And she saw herself, you know,
gain weight and get chunky.
Her skin broke out,
and her features
weren't that fine, beautiful,
female thing that we
see pictures everywhere.
And so she had
questions about her own,
you know, desirability.
She demanded to be different.
You know, our parents had
given us permission to do it
and then weren't aware of what
would happen if you did it.
Janis was the first one in
our family to find that out,
that if you were rocking the
boat, you might get noticed.
And she rocked the boat
as often as she could.
She liked rocking the boat.
The world was changing,
and I think that Janis's
interpretation of what being
good was included things that
a lot of people in the South
weren't yet ready to include.
She said, I think immigration
is the right thing to do.
Well, our hometown had
an active KKK chapter.
And what happened
was she was harassed
by some guys in her class.
They threw pennies at her.
They called her names,
and she became a target
for the last three
years of high school.
She started dressing
differently, wearing loafers
without socks and tight skirts.
Her hair was becoming
more, like, beatnik,
and still there was an
aspect of her sexuality
and her personality
that was at odds.
Where does she go?
What does she do?
She was pushing the
limits, and women
weren't supposed to swear.
And women were
supposed to be demure
and not know that anything
existed below their waistlines.
And I met her in high school,
and she wouldn't go away.
She was always calling us
up, one of us or the other,
and say, what are
you doing tonight'?
Where are we going?
She was a lot of trouble.
We went to Louisiana, and
she would start fights which
we didn't want started
because the Cajuns
were known, good fighters.
But she got a kick out of it,
just playing the bad girl.
She wasn't a bad girl.
I mean, she just
liked to bait the men.
You know, we would deny
all knowledge of her
and barely escape
with our lives.
That made her real
dangerous to take to a bar.
I mean, she was amusing, so we
took her to the beach with us.
She borrowed some records
which were obscure.
One of them was a
record by Odetta.
All of a sudden, she busted into
a perfect imitation of Odetta
on the record, and
everybody was just
stunned... this little,
troublesome kid, you know,
could sing that well.
This particular
night Janis said,
let's go see this
wonderful Austin
you're always talking about.
So we pulled in at
five thirty in the morning,
and you could hear music.
And it wasn't recorded music.
It was live music.
And Janis grabbed my
arm, and she said,
Jack, I am going
to like it here.
On accident, I discovered
I had an incredibly loud voice.
So I started singing blues
because that was always
what I liked, and, you know,
I got in a bluegrass band,
played hillbilly music in
Austin, Texas for free beer.
I used to sing at folk
clubs just for a goof.
We call ourselves
the Waller Creek Boys,
and instantly Janis
became one of the boys.
People just stared
open mouthed, and she
was not ever accepted, really,
except by the folk community.
Growing up, her peers picked
on her and bullied her.
And by the time
she got to Austin,
and by the time I knew
her, she had already been
profoundly hurt over and over.
And so in Austin,
it was the same way.
Every year, the
fraternities held a contest,
and people could nominate
someone to be ugliest man.
And someone nominated Janis, and
all these jerks voted for her.
And it crushed her,
saddest thing I ever saw.
You know, it really was.
To that point, I'd
never seen Janis cry.
Janis had a very tough
exterior, but it really got her.
It got her bad.
And I said, Janis, they
don't mean anything to you.
They're... they're not
even in your class.
It became increasingly
harder to fit
into a group of angry, angry
men who liked to pick on her.
Even though she ran around with
a tight group of friends that
were into books and
ideas, she needed
to go out to where
the people were
that wrote those books,
where the people were
that sung those songs.
Where does she go?
What does she do?
San Francisco.
It would have to be about
'63 or something like that.
I couldn't stand Texas anymore,
and I went to California
because it's a lot freer.
You can do what you want
to do, and nobody bugs you.
15,000 San
Franciscans protest segregation
in Birmingham, negro
and white citizens
marching in unity for
equality in San Francisco.
We used to all hang out at
a bar called the Anxious Asp
on Green Street in North Beach.
We went to a party one
night, and, you know,
with a little of wine and
a little bit of, you know,
whatever, We kind
of got to talking.
And two weeks later,
she moved in with me.
Sometimes, we went
down to Monterrey,
and she would sing
in the hootenannies.
And she would win tickets for
us to get to the main arena.
One time, we went there, and
there was Bob Dylan, her idol.
And she walks up to him, and she
said, oh, Bob, I just love you.
You know, I'm gonna
be famous one day.
He said, yeah, we're
all gonna be famous.
I'll never forget
that, you know?
She definitely felt the blues.
Bessie Smith and all
the blues singers,
she loved those people.
And I think she emulated
them in the sense of wanting
to be like them, you
know, to have the pain,
and I guess that's
why she drank like she
did and took drugs
because that's
all part of the whole picture.
She definitely needed people
to tell her how great she was,
and she needed that
stroking all the time.
I don't think she was with
girls to shock people.
I think she was with
girls because that's
what she felt at the moment.
And I think she was
totally in a conflict
all the time with
herself, constantly,
and she was unhappy.
She was quite
unhappy, and I think
on the stage it made her feel
that she was somebody, that she
had something to offer.
And I said, I just think this
is not working for both of us.
You know, you want to go off
and do things with other people,
and I'm not strong
enough to handle that.
She got with this
English fellow,
and they were into shooting
up and stuff like that.
And that was never my style.
You know, I just never
could get into that.
Janis was in North
Beach, and she
developed an
intense relationship
with Peter de Blanc.
Then Janis got into methadrine.
Janis told me that
they were living
in that building
behind Tommy's joint
and had not a
stick of furniture.
And Peter was just sitting
there for hours on end
throwing a Super Ball against
the wall and catching it.
And she was skin and bones.
She used, overused, lost weight,
got so strung out that her
group of friends held a party,
and they passed the
hat to get enough money
to put her on a Greyhound
bus and send her back home.
She and Peter decided
that they both needed
to get their lives cleaned up
and would go to their hometowns
and get their lives
together, and then they'd
get together and get married.
Dear Peter, well, I'm home now.
I have your picture on the
desk where I do my homework,
and everyone in the family's
seen it at least three times.
Everyone agrees you're handsome.
I really love you.
In attempting to find a
semblance of a pattern
in my life, I find I've gone
out with great vigor every time
and gotten really fucked up.
All I did was be wild,
drank constantly,
fucked people, sang.
Then San Francisco, kind
of wanting to find an old
man and be happy, but I didn't.
I just found Linda and
became a meth freak.
Jesus fucking Christ, I want
to be happy so fucking bad.
He came home at one
point and met the family
and asked our father formally
for her hand in marriage.
Well, now it's Saturday,
and you're letter didn't come.
So I'm very sad and
moping around the house,
and mother's worried.
Baby, what's happening?
You could really be hurting
me, and, hell, I couldn't tell.
Am I still happy?
Do I still have you?
She was embarrassed
that he wasn't
going to show up
after she had told
her mom and dad that he was.
He was evidently living with a
woman who he'd gotten pregnant.
And Janis only discovered that
when she happened to call him,
and this woman
answered the telephone.
Do you ever go
back to Port Arthur?
I went back once.
It's a... it's a bummer, and
I ain't going back again.
No, it's no good.
Chet asked me to come
and see his new band,
and that's when I heard that Big
Brother was auditioning women.
So I went by his house and said,
you know, I'm going to go home.
I can ask about
Janis if you like.
And she found out
that I was there,
and we spent the whole
day talking about what was
going on since she had left.
And we should go see
a rock and roll band,
and there's one playing
around the corner.
Didn't have anything to
drink because she was sober.
And we listened to, I think,
two songs, and she turned to me
and she said, that's
what I want to do.
So I said, OK.
Let's go figure this out.
He said, I'm not
going to go and take
it till you tell your parents.
He waited in the car while Janis
went in to tell her parents.
Janis went in and said she was
going to Austin for the weekend
and left and went
to San Francisco.
Mother and
Dad, with a great deal of
trepidation, I bring the news.
I am in San Francisco.
Now, let me explain.
Chet Helms, an old friend,
now is Mr. Big in SF.
He encouraged me to come out.
Seems the whole city had gone
rock and roll, and it has.
And he assured me fame
and fortune, so I came.
I'm so sorry.
My love to Mike and Laura.
Love, Janis.
I would pick her
up, and I'd drive her
back to where she was staying.
I mean, she was always like,
I don't know whether this
is going to work out.
I probably... I should
go back to Texas.
I don't know if
I should do this.
She had a lot of misgivings.
She was very afraid of drugs.
She said, I don't ever want
to see anybody shooting drugs.
I can't stand to see that
because if I see that,
it's just going to
take her out so much.
She came out to San
Francisco and had
this coffeehouse career.
She almost died that time.
She lost all this
weight, you know,
and she went back to Texas.
And her mother said, if you
ever go back out there again,
you're going to die.
Parents encourage
you to sing at all?
Oh, no, no, no, they wanted
me to be a schoolteacher,
you know, like all parents.
But I started singing
when I was about 17.
I listened to a
lot of music first,
and one day I started singing.
And I could sing.
It was, like, it was a
surprise, to say the least.
Dear Mother
and Dad, Daddy brought up
the college issue,
which is good because I
probably would have continued
avoiding it until it went away.
I don't think I can go back now.
I don't know all the reasons,
but I just feel that this
a truer feeling, true to me.
I don't feel like I'm lying now.
I have to see this
through first.
If I don't, I'd always be
thinking about singing,
being good and known, and
feel like I cheated myself,
you know?
Weak as it is, I
apologize for being so
just plain bad in the family.
I'm just sorry, love, Janis.
We're all primitive musicians.
We're self-taught.
We don't know much about music.
We're not trained in the
music that we're doing.
We've all sort of come to it.
I was trained on
triangle and tuba.
Tuba, you weren't house trained.
You're a great
triangle player, baby.
I wasn't even house trained.
Go outside.
I used to be sort of
like a blues singer.
And Jimmy Swift.
Jimmy Swift?
She used to be a
baseball player,
and she always used
to say, sock it to me.
Folk blues, you know,
I was a folk singer,
you know, and sang blues mostly,
country blues, old time blues,
slow.
Didn't you have a
job soldering once?
Soldering?
No, a key punch operator.
It was a back then.
I was a waitress in a
bowling alley once, too.
Playing is like the
mostest fun there is.
Feeling things and really
getting into it, that's fun.
At that time,
there was definitely
a sense Of camaraderie.
If you knew the Grateful Dead
had the house on Ashbury,
it Wouldn't be unlikely that
if you were in the neighborhood
you'd just drop by and
hang out with those guys
and smoke a joint or
something like that.
We were all sort of riding the
same wave in a sense, all part
of the same scene, and
all shared, in some ways,
the same values
that we were par':
of this counterculture,
revolutionary music thing that
was going to change the world.
She was just funny,
unassuming, sexy,
and sort of a kind of, like,
almost a sort of Huck Finn
innocence to her, the
absolutely child-woman
ideal of the.
Well, I met Janis as
a romantic interest
for one of my band mates,
Pigpen, Ron McKernan.
We called him the Mighty Pig.
It was an on again, off again
little affair that they had.
And on the nights that Janis
would come over and visit,
I got very little
sleep because Janis
was not real quiet in the rack.
And so all night long, it
would be, daddy, daddy,
daddy, all that kind of
stuff, I mean, but endlessly.
Isn't Pigpen cute?
They make Pigpen T-shirts
now with his picture
on it for fans.
I have one in red.
Those people are
all friends of mine.
Aren't they amazing?
The people with stars
after their names
are members of the band.
I'm in the back on the left,
really an amazing picture.
They aren't dressed up.
They look that way all the time.
Now, taken in perspective,
I'm not so far out at all, eh'?
There was a party.
There was a party in
the city at an apartment
on California Street.
Someone opened this bottle
model of this stuff.
It's called Cold Duck.
You don't sit it around much.
Sparkling wine.
Sparkling wine, and it
started to go around the room,
and people were
taking chugs of it.
And Janis took a big swig of it.
And someone said to
Janis, oh, man, you
must really want to get high.
And she just went, like, what?
And someone said, yeah,
there's, like, you know,
60, 80 hits of acid in
that bottle of Cold Duck.
Anyway, she ran into the
bathroom and tried to throw up.
But she got very high, anyway,
and we went from this party
to the Fillmore.
And Otis Redding was I
think in his second night,
and it was his second show.
They did two shows, so there
weren't a lot of people there.
And I remember sitting with her.
We sat down in the
middle of the floor,
and Otis Redding came
out with his band.
I think when she saw him and
so the way he moved and how
he interpreted a song, I
really think it very much
affected her.
I mean, literally, she'd start
doing this got to, go to,
go to.
She stole that.
Billie Holiday, Aretha Franklin,
now, they are so subtle.
They can milk you
with two notes.
They could go no
farther from A to B,
and they could make you
feel like they told you
the whole universe, you know?
And Otis, too.
And Otis, oh, Otis, my man,
but I don't know that yet.
All I got now is strength,
but maybe if I keep singing,
maybe I'll get it.
That's what I think.
Mother,
haven't heard from you yet.
But I'm brimming with
news, so here I am.
Last weekend, we
played in the city,
and a man from Elektra, a good
label, spoke to me afterwards.
Rothchild feels
that popular music
can't continue getting
farther and farther
out and more chaotic.
He feels there's going
to be a reaction,
and old-fashioned music...
Blues, shuffles, melodic stuff...
Is going to come back in.
Well, Elektra wants to form
the group to be this way,
and they want me.
Wish I could ask someone for
advice that knew and wasn't
biased for any reason.
Ah, dream on, Janis.
We thought maybe we
could get Janis to be
more locked into the group.
I took her down the hill,
down a little pathway
here through the
woods, and talked
to her all about this stuff.
And a lot of what you would
say the American dream
of most girls in the '50s and
'60s came out at that time.
She said, you know, I've
dreamed about all this stuff
all my life, being on the
cover of these magazines
and having a fancy car and
living in a fancy home.
And I don't know what to do.
I mean, you guys are
good stuff, but, I mean-
and I said, you know, a lot
of that stuff was bullshit,
and give us a chance.
Give us a month.
Bobby Shad from Mainstream
Records, he offered us a deal,
and so we signed this
bad record contract.
And at the same
time, in doing so,
we were kind of locking in Janis
and that she knew what she was
doing, that she was
in some way locking
herself in with the band
for at least a few years.
It was good that
she stayed with us
because we let her alone.
You know, we weren't talented
enough to get in her way.
You know what I mean?
We weren't strong enough.
But those guys, you know,
Paul Rothchild, they
would have eaten her alive.
They would have shoved
her over in the corner,
as much as you could
shove Janis in the corner.
In the very
beginning, she didn't
take over as, I'm the singer.
I'm the lead singer.
She really tried to
integrate into the band
and be part of it.
The big turning point
was Monterey Pop.
A very good friend of mine
said, you've got to come
to the Monterey Pop Festival.
There's never been
a Pop Festival.
You know, you're going
to have a great time.
It's a weekend.
It's in Monterey, California.
Simon and Garfunkel were
going to perform there.
That's all I knew about.
So I came here with my khaki
pants and a tennis sweater,
and I was astonished by
everything that I saw.
I got a call from
Lou Adler, who was
the producer of Monterey Pop.
He was also the manager of
the Mamas and the Papas.
He told me there's
in the Monterey Pop Festival.
Well, Big Brother, come.
I saw the future.
He offered me a number,
and I went for it.
I didn't give a damn
about the money.
I knew that this was
going to be a monster.
So I vividly remember
sitting in the grounds
there, being surrounded
by this unusual crowd,
and then they
announced the group.
Three or four years ago,
I ran into a chick in Texas
by the name of Janis Joplin,
and I heard her sing.
And Janis and I hitchhiked
to the West Coast.
A lot of things have gone
down since that time,
but it gives me a
great deal of pride
to present today
the finished product
of three or four years
of work, Big Brother
and the Holding Company.
We had been told
about Monterey Pop
that it was going
to be a big party,
and everybody's
playing for free.
And no one's going
to make any money.
And then all of a sudden
there's a movie being made
by DA Pennebaker,
and they're asking
everybody to sign a release
just before you get on stage.
I thought everybody
in this country
is dying to get
out to California
to see what's going on.
And so, without even
thinking, I said, sure.
Lou Adler wanted me to sign,
as he had everybody sign,
the contract for the movie.
And I said, no.
And he kept on it,
and I kept saying, no.
There was a whole sort of San
Francisco kind of contingent
that was of the
sort of philosophy
that these LA guys
are not going to make
a movie out of out stuff.
We're not going to
be in your movie.
We just came for the party.
There were nine big machine-gun
cameras around the arena.
All nine cameras were
pointed down to the ground.
Now, they're starting
to come off stage.
People are starting
to tell them.
This wasn't filmed.
This wasn't filmed.
This wasn't filmed.
But Janis is really pissed off.
They got to Janis, John Phillips
and Lou Adler and these
people, and they said, look.
We'll put you on again.
We'll give you a second show
if you'll be in the movie.
And to make a long story short,
there was a lot of infighting
amongst the band
and our manager.
Grossman was involved, too.
And Albert Grossman
got involved.
I went to Albert,
and I said, Albert,
I know what you have to do.
But you better find
a way to get her
so that we can film her because
she's really critical to this.
This group we'd
like to bring on now
because of the great acceptance
they had on Saturday afternoon.
From San Francisco,
on Mainstream Records,
let's hear it for Big Brother
and the Holding Company.
Cass was sitting there
in one of the rows,
and I kind of had an
eye on her during Janis
because they had been a
little critical because they
were Los Angelenos.
And the Los Angelenos
were somewhat
critical of the San Franciscans
in terms of the bands.
And so I kind of wanted to
watch her when Janis sang.
Sitting down by my window,
just looking out at the rain.
Something came along,
honey, grabbed a hold of me,
and it felt like
a ball and chain.
Well, yeah.
And I said, oh, oh, oh,
well, honey, this can't be.
This can't be in vain.
Na, na, na, na,
na, na, na, and I
said, oh, oh, oh, well,
honey, oh, this can't be
b... b... b... baby, not in vain.
I said, no, no,
no, no, yeah, whoa,
and I want somebody
to tell me, come on.
And tell me why, why, 0h,
people tell me why love,
honey, why love is like, well,
it's like a ball and a chain.
Once she caught real
recognition at the Monterey Pop
Festival, I think
she began to see
what the possibilities were.
And the possibilities were
somewhat over the top.
Dear Mother, at
last, a tranquil day and time
to write all the good news.
I'm now safely moved into my
new room in our beautiful house
in the country.
Gosh, I can't seem to find
anything else to talk about.
This band is my whole life now.
I really am totally
committed, and I dig it.
I wanted to send
you these clippings.
Since Monterey, all
this has come about.
Did "Port Arthur News"
have anything on these?
If so, please send.
I just may be a star someday.
You know, it's funny.
As it gets closer and more
probable, being a star
is really losing its meaning.
But whatever it
means, I'm ready.
Things are going so
well for me personally.
I have a boyfriend.
He's head of Country Joe and
the Fish, a band from Berkeley.
He' a Capricorn
like me and is 25,
and so far we're
getting along fine.
Everyone in the rock
scene just thinks
it's the cutest thing
they've ever seen,
and it is rather cute actually.
Oh, we were never in
love with each other.
No, no, there was
no sizzle going on.
We were good friends.
We were both control
freaks, both lead singers.
There was a maternal
feminine side of her
that never was allowed to grow.
She was really trying
hard, you know,
and her mother was
coming to town.
She wanted to cook chow
mein for her mother.
She was so worried
that her mother
would like her apartment.
And had just
made that poster of her naked
with the necklaces.
We put them all up on the wall.
We went out to visit her the
Summer of Love as a family.
My brother and I were the
only teenagers who probably
went outwith their parents.
You know, we go to see Janis.
And we're walking
down the streets.
She's showing us around,
and I was so excited.
Then We went to the
Avalon Ballroom,
and Big Brother was not
on the bill that night.
But they went on and
did three or four songs.
Moby Grape let them have
a set because Janis's
parents were there.
When we were getting
ready to leave,
I remember overhearing one of
my parents tell the other one,
you know, dear, I
don't think we're going
to have much influence anymore.
I think that her own
telling of her story
was about the ability to make
your life fit your values,
and she found that
opportunity in the music
world of the 1960s.
The social acceptance that
she'd always wanted was there,
and it just propelled
her forward.
Come on.
Come on.
Come on.
Come on.
Didn't I make you feel
like you were the only man?
It felt so fresh
and so different
for someone who'd
been an outcast.
Each time I tell myself that I,
well, I think I've had enough.
But I'm gonna show you, baby,
that a woman can be tough.
I want you to come on.
Come on.
Come on.
Come on.
Take it.
Take another little piece
of my heart now, baby.
Break it.
Break another little piece
of my heart, oh, yeah.
Come on.
Take another little piece
of my heart now, baby.
You know you got it if
it makes you feel good.
You've got another
manager, Albert Grossman,
who also manages Bob Dylan.
Yeah, he's better.
Dear Mother,
as of yesterday afternoon,
we're officially with Columbia.
Wow, I'm so lucky.
25, 25, 25, it's
all too incredible.
I just fumbled around
being a mixed-up kid
and then fell into this.
Finally, it looks
like something is
gonna work for me... incredible.
February 20, 1968,
Dear Mother, our record
is a success story in itself.
We got a gold album
in three days,
and the most fantastic thing of
all happened at the Rose Bowl.
The cops wouldn't let the
kids off the grass near us.
And all of a sudden they
broke, just like a wave,
and swarmed onto the field.
They were pulling on my
clothes, my beads, calling,
Janis, Janis, we love you.
Come on.
Take another little piece
of my heart now baby.
You know you got it, man,
if it makes you feel good.
She had a sense that as long
as people gave her the stage,
she would be a winner.
Let's sit down, boys.
Come on, boys.
Let's sit down.
Here we are, sitting down.
Almost everybody's sitting down.
Oh, yes.
Fantastic.
Is there a San Francisco sound?
And if so, what is it,
and how did it start?
The thing that makes what they
call the San Francisco music
scene, as far as I'm concerned,
is, like, first of all,
the freedom to create here.
You know, for some reason,
like, a lot of musicians
ended up here and
ended up together
and had complete freedom to
do whatever they wanted to.
And so they came up with
their own kind of music.
What do you think, Sam?
Honey.
That's what we call
love music, baby.
Not bad.
Well, here we are,
together again at last,
by popular demand.
- Honey.
How are ya?
Yeah, I don't know what it was.
We sort of hit it
off right away.
Was she romantically
attached to me?
I would hope so.
May I light your fire, my child?
I guess not.
Apparently not,
no, well, I would
have bet against it myself.
We were good friends.
And I will level with you.
We may or may not have
ended up intimate.
I just, you know,
my memory is so bad.
Or so good.
We lived in the
Chelsea Hotel while we
were making Cheap Thrills
and while we were touring.
And we lived in Los Angeles.
About half the time,
we were in Hollywood,
and half the time we were at
the Chelsea Hotel in Manhattan.
And it was just so much fun.
You know, we would get together
and do heroin at these people's
rooms and just kind of not nod
off or go to sleep or something
but just have really nice
mellow conversations.
She liked New York, and it had
that tombstone quality for her.
And so I was going to do a
little film with her because I
really liked her a lot.
And she was recording
stuff with the band,
and I would go and
listen and film them.
I was interested mostly in
how she understood to control
her singing because
her singing had
this thing of when she'd lose
it, she would shout and scream.
And sometimes that
was very effective,
but the music had to have
something more to it than that.
Liar, I think it's a
real good-liar, liar.
Let's do Summertime.
OK, let's go.
Play the second one,
when she goes, no, no, no,
don't you cry.
No, no, no,
no, no, don't you cry.
At the very end of the song.
End of the song, the
last chord of the song.
You're first G major
arpeggio, I think, is wrong.
That's when she says, cry.
What do you want, like,
six arpeggios of G minor?
Because it changes to B
minor for two after that.
He's already in a major.
He's trying to get in a minor.
We can do it either way.
I mean, they're both
valid approaches.
But I think if we...
Like, it's 10 o'clock.
I think by 4:00 we
could have Summertime.
I'd say if we don't do it
by 12 o'clock or 1 o'clock,
we can spend a few hours doing
something else, you know?
If you all voted to do
a bunch of them tonight,
it's OK with me.
But I personally
don't agree with it.
Playing it and
listening to it back
ain't gonna take
us a damn thing.
Man, I know exactly what
that song sounds like,
and I've racked my brain to
try and get ideas for it,
as I'm sure everybody else has.
D major and D minor
sing don't you cry.
I don't even know what it says.
Turn that mic thing off.
OK,.
Hey, don't go away.
You look so cute when
you're passed out.
You look just like a hot dog.
OK.
OK, good time.
You dug it the first
time you heard it.
Yeah, I did dig it.
I did dig it the
first time I heard it.
I also liked the other way.
I mean, I think maybe an
adaptation or.
Yeah, right, because, like,
yours had a lot of lyricism
to it, but this has nothing
but-frenetic is the word.
Oh, one of
these mornings, child,
you'll rise up singing, babe.
I said you're gonna go, honey,
gonna spread your wings.
Honey, take, take to the sky.
Move the sky.
Until that morning, honey, no,
nothing's gonna harm you, baby.
I said, honey, nothings
ever gonna let you down.
Oh, it just wouldn't do it.
Hush, baby, baby,
baby, baby, baby, baby.
No, no, no, no, don't you cry.
Janis Joplin and the Holding
Company, aren't they great?
Absolutely great, Janis, I just
thought you were wonderful.
You know, you were written up
recently in "Life Magazine,"
and I have a copy here.
And I'd like to read
what you were quoted
as saying about your music.
The audience sitting
down is a weird trip.
It's like separateness.
But when they're dancing,
they're doing it with you,
like you said it to them.
And they've got it, and you
can play freer and freer.
Would you care to
elaborate on that?
It sounds different when
you say it,.
It's sort of like
you as a performer
will understand like an audience
communicating with a performer.
Instead of one giving
and one receiving,
it's, like, a reciprocal thing.
When an audience is dancing,
they're communicating with you.
And you know that
you're getting to them.
And they're grooving,
and you're grooving.
And it's sort of like feedback.
Do you know what feedback
is in amplifiers?
Yes.
When you play the note
too loud, and the amplifier
will play it back.
And you play it back.
And it goes around and back,
and it just makes everything
go higher and higher.
I see, well, that...
That clears it up for me.
Dear family,
lots of trouble in the band,
most of them revolving
around the fact
that I think I'm hot
shit, as I'm told
by everyone from Albert down.
And the band is sloppy.
When she came into
the band, Peter
was the leader of the
band, the bass player,
and James was the
mythic, iconic, you know,
beautiful figure.
He represented the band.
And then here comes Janis.
And when she joined
the band, she
became both of those things.
They had a very complicated
reaction to her fame.
There was a cadre
of hangers that
sort of insulated her from her
band, from what I could see.
And it was just a matter
of time until somebody
tried to polish her up and
make a big star out of her.
It's crazy, now, to think back
at it that we signed, you know,
a management agreement
with the guy.
But I think from
the very get go,
I think there was a sense that
he was not a big fan of ours,
that he really was into Janis.
But we wanted to believe that he
would work for the whole band.
And the guys in the
band were powerless.
No one had the ability to
stop that from happening.
She was a singularity,
and she attracted
that kind of attention.
She cared about Big
Brother's career.
She loved those guys, but
there was something that she
saw that was beyond that.
And if she didn't do it,
she'd never know if she could.
Dear family,
so we're back in California
for two more weeks.
After that, begins
my hardest task.
I told you, remember, that
I was leaving Big Brother
and going to do a
thing on my own.
There will be a whole lot of
pressure because of the vibes
created by my
leaving Big Brother,
and also just how big I am now.
Nobody ever saw her wearing
those kind of clothes,
but that's the
kind of clothes she
had when she came for Texas.
If someone said, well, what
did you learn from Janis?
What did she teach you?
If I had to say
it in a sentence,
it's emotional honesty and the
price of not emotional honesty.
She started to lose that.
She started to become something
that people expected of her.
She started to
become a caricature
of what she was and play
it for people, you know?
And I think that
hurt her in some way.
Take this lonely heart
from one lonely girl.
Reach in to high, babe, can't
help from getting burned.
Everything she ever wrote
pretty much is autobiographical.
And I thought the
reaching too high, babe,
too, this is done
right at the time
when she's leaving Big Brother.
She knows she's kind of
going to go for some higher
level of fame and
stardom and, you know,
she might fall on her face.
She knew that.
It might not work out.
She might get burned.
The fallout for James
and Peter and David
was significant because
Janis asked Sam to come
with her to her new band.
I loved Jan.
I loved her all the way through.
You know, the first
time I ever saw her,
she just had this
attitude that I liked.
It wasn't belligerent, but
it was non-compromising.
She's loud.
She's one of these
loud Texas women.
She's real smart and
considerate most of the time.
And we both had
real quick tempers.
They called me up
to play with Janis,
so they sent me a ticket.
And I went to New York.
And I went there, and
they opened the door.
And this girl had on a
bra and some panties.
She said, hi, I'm Janis.
I said, hi, I'm in
the right place.
And she started singing.
I said, damn.
Are you sure she's white?
When you quit Big Brother
and the Holding Company,
why did you do that?
Well, just because it was
sort of just time for us,
I think, to go on and
do something else.
You know what I mean?
Like, you grow together,
you know, a certain way,
and you sort of
exhaust each other.
You exhaust the good that
you can do for each other,
and it was just
time for us to start
growing in other directions.
You know what I mean?
You know, I think you
really grow as a musician.
And that's what, after all,
we're supposed to be all about,
is trying to get better
at what we do, you know'?
San Francisco was
the first place,
the first community, Where
Janis really felt at home.
When she left Big
Brother, she lost it.
The pressure to
succeed was huge,
and she was carrying
around this weight.
You know, she didn't
know how to lead a band.
That's one of the
reasons it was a mistake.
She didn't know how
to lead the band.
And she was in charge, so she
had people putting together
that band for her, along with a
lot of other strange people who
were appointed band directors.
It wasn't working.
There were changes in
personnel, and none of it
solved anything.
We went to Europe only, like,
two months into touring.
She's there with a new band
which doesn't know what
the hell it's supposed to be.
OK, You GUYS-
You know what?
I make it a policy.
We played in Frankfurt,
and Janis was freaking out.
We peeped out a curtain,
and all of these dudes
were sitting there with
their little haircuts,
like you put a bowl on their
head and cut around the bowl.
(Is everybody read)
But we felt like playing.
We said, hey, man,
we'll play the show.
If y'all want to boogie, come
on up here with us and boogie.
If there's something you need,
hun, that you've never ever
had, I know you've never had it.
Oh, honey, don't you
sit there crying.
Don't just sit there
feeling bad, no, no, no.
You better get up.
Now, do you understand?
Raise your hand.
Hey, hey! hey.
Raise your hand.
Right here, right now.
Hey.
Whoa, oh, yeah.
I'm nobody.
I'm just a fan.
No, I'm just a fan.
I'm crazy about her.
Where from you are friend?
I can't talk.
Quit taking pictures of me.
Why not?
Because I'm not groovy.
She's groovy.
Look at her.
I guess because we're
strangers in foreign lands,
the Cosmic Blues
Band came together.
The Albert Hall in London
was the last concert,
and Janis knew that
Bob Dylan had sold out.
And she was really excited
about playing the Albert Hall,
and she did sell out.
She got people dancing in the
aisles at the Albert Hall,
and she was just ecstatic after.
Excited,
woo, nobody ever-nobody,
anybody, ever thought
it would be that good.
Nobody's ever
fucking got up yet.
No one's ever got up
and danced and dug it.
No one's ever done anything
there, and they did it, man.
They fucking got up and grooved.
Then they listened.
God, I'm so happy, woo-hoe.
When Janis was on stage
and things were going well,
all was right with the world.
But after that hour, you've
got to come off stage.
She used to say that
it was like making love,
being on the stage, you
know, but it's an illusion.
When the show's over,
the audience leaves,
and you're left with yourself.
She rarely was using
heroin before a concert
because it wasn't the right
kind of energy for onstage,
and she cared about that.
But her after-the-concert
fix was a real regular thing.
We were devolving into this drug
use that was way out of hand.
I have to, you know,
digress for a second say,
when Janis was in Big Brother,
Peter didn't do any drugs.
You know, so out
of respect to him,
we kept it toned down a lot.
So now she's in Cosmic
Blues so we're doing really
a lot of drugs, you know,
because Peter's not-...
Daddy isn't there anymore.
We're free, and we can
do all these drugs now.
So it really got out of hand.
In Los Angeles, in particular,
at the Landmark Hotel,
she called me to her room.
And she said, your services
are no longer needed.
And so then we shot up
some heroin, and she said,
well, aren't you
going to ask me why?
I said what difference
does it make?
It was just like a marriage, you
know, it had run out of juice.
And a lot of our friends
were dying that year.
She's lying on a motel
bed, and she says,
it's not going to happen to me.
She said, my people
are pioneer stock,
you know, and they came
across the country.
And they came to Texas.
They're tough.
I've got those
genes, and nothing's
going to happen to me.
And I said, shit, I wish
you wouldn't have said that.
We had heard about Woodstock
from pretty well in advance.
And we thought, oh, great.
It's the next Monterey.
It's a very warm summer day,
and all this variety of choppers
are taking off and landing.
I do remember that Peggy
was on the airlift zone
where we took off from.
I was always apprehensive when
Peggy was around because I felt
that she would be an enabler,
rather than a helper,
with the drug problem.
She called and
said, you have to come.
I said, I can't, because
we were hearing reports
that the turnpike
was bogged down.
And people were out of
gas and having babies,
and, you know, it was like
locusts coming through.
And so I said the
only way I'd come out
there is if I was airlifted in.
And she said, OK.
We were both around the
same age in the South
with middle-class families.
But I think Janis had a
harder time of coming through.
But on the other hand, you know,
people tend to take because
of that she was depressed.
She wasn't.
It was all fun.
We shot heroin for fun,
and it took the edge off.
We were in the midst
of one of the most
social phenomenons in history.
What I understand
is she got very
high shooting up in the
portisan and couldn't go on.
Finally, Peggy and John Cooke
had to push her onstage.
How are y'all... how... I mean,
um, how are you out there?
Are you mellow?
Are you OK?
You're not, uh, are
you staying stoned?
And you've got enough water,
and you've got a place
to sleep and everything?
Because, you know, because we
ought to all of us, you know,
I don't mean to be preachy.
But we ought to remember... and
that means promoters, too...
That music's for grooving, man.
And music's not for putting
yourself through bad changes.
You know, I mean, you don't
have to take anybody's shit,
man, just to like music.
You know what I mean?
You don't.
So if you're getting more
shit than you deserve,
you know what to
do about it, man.
Work me, lord.
Work me, lord.
Please, don't you leave me.
I feel so useless down
here with no one to love,
though I've looked everywhere.
And I can't find me anybody
to love, to feel my care.
So work me.
Whoa, oh, use me, lord.
Did you ever have a whole night,
though, you just stand
up there and feel
like you're not making it?
Well, yeah, but you
kind of try and... you
have little games that
you play with yourself
to turn yourself on.
You can usually
get yourself going.
You never had a desire to
just leave the stage and say,
I'm sorry, it isn't
working tonight, folks?
It's the best thing
ever happened to me.
I wouldn't leave.
Yeah, yeah, if you
couldn't do it anymore,
you'd be miserable, huh?
Yeah, I hope that by
that time, I'll have
something else that's groovy.
Whoa, whoa, please, oh, no, no,
no, no, no, please...
Ah, oh, no, no,
no, don't you go and leave me.
Honey, when I reach
you, I want to,
I said I want to hold on to you.
Well, you're never there.
It doesn't turn me off, man.
I still reach out to
hold onto my man.
I said, daddy, daddy, daddy,
daddy, daddy, don't you go.
No, no, no, no, honey, don't
you go and leave some love.
This is the dark time
in my time with Janis.
Albert and Janis
reached a point where
they said, well, we're
going to let the Cosmic
Blues Band dissipate.
Janis took that
failure on herself.
She felt that she was failing.
And this was, as
a result, by far,
their worst abuse of
heroin and alcohol.
Well, this whole thing that's
happened to me, you see,
this whole success
thing, uh, it hasn't yet
really compromised
the position that I
took a long time ago in Texas.
That was to be true
to myself, to be
the person that was
on the inside of me
and not play games.
And so that's What I'm trying
to do mostly in the whole world,
is to not bullshit myself.
When I saw her in the hotel, all
of the uncertainties
and the little girl
lost were very visible.
And she said, come
on up, and we'll
order drinks from room service.
And I hadn't been
there very long
when she decided to shoot up.
And I'd never seen
her do that before.
And then we had some drinks.
We talked, and she did
it again before I left.
When I left, I thought,
I don't know if I
will want to see her again.
What do you think
when you're singing?
Are you actually thinking
what's going on in the song,
or can your mind
be somewhere else?
I'm not really thinking much.
You just sort of try and feel.
When last I heard of you, you
were in the jungles of Brazil.
I went to Rio for a
carnival, and then I
decided to hitchhike around
the northern part of Brazil.
As a kind of vacation?
Just like a regular
old beatnik on the road.
I knew I was going to try to
make it to Rio for carnivals
because I was meeting
a friend of mine.
So I got to Rio a
couple days early.
And I thought, God,
there's Ipanema Beach,
the girl from Ipanema you know?
So I went over to Ipanema Beach
and the very first person I ran
into on the beach was Janis.
So I didn't know it was Janis.
I just saw this girl
with a bikini on.
She looked up.
I remember her lifting her
sunglasses up and saying,
hi, you cute thing.
And I went, wow,
I, a cute thing.
I had been in the
jungle a long time.
When we went back to the
hotel the first night,
she wasn't sleeping well.
She was rolling around.
She was unhappy.
She was having cold sweats.
And she told me that she was
trying to kick the habit.
So I held her for two and a
half days while she came down.
She was really a
different person.
She was much more calm.
She was much more beautiful.
You know, and she wasn't
used to being straight,
so she knew she
was more beautiful.
And then after that,
everything was clear.
She couldn't have gotten higher
when we traveled around Brazil.
She was so free and so
different than any other girl
I'd ever met.
I never had a woman inspire
me before, so it stopped
me in my track, so to speak.
I was heading for North Africa.
And when I met her, I realized,
shit, I'm not going anywhere.
When we came back to
California, we more spent time
together just the two of us.
I mean, we did come
to the park here,
and we did go to.
But basically, we just
pretty much fun together.
We were inseparable,
really, for those months.
As my relationship
with Janis grew,
I realized that when she
sang me all these songs,
they were always the blues.
And that's what she felt,
basically, were the blues.
She could feel everybody's pain.
That's one of the
reasons she did
heroin was so she didn't
have to be involved
with everybody else's life.
Most people can be oblivious
to what's going on around them,
but Janis couldn't.
She couldn't block it out.
But she was addicted to it, you
know, and I got her to stop.
And then when I would
go away, she'd get weak,
I guess is one way to say
it, and start it again.
I told her I can't do that part.
I can't put up with that
because it's killing you.
And it broke my heart to see.
That's really what it is.
It broke my heart
more than anything.
When I said I was
leaving, she said,
why don't you stay
and become my manager?
And it was a tempting offer,
but the heroin I couldn't even
begin to put up with.
Baby, yeah, baby, well, baby,
oh, honey, welcome back home.
I had a man.
He said, honey, honey,
you know that I love you.
See, but I gotta go find myself.
You know, I gotta
go and find my life.
I gotta go find myself over in
Africa or over in, uh, New York
City or over in, uh,
, some place
those cats are always
wandering off to.
I never figured out
exactly where it was.
They're always going
somewhere, man.
And I said, baby,
don't you realize?
You're looking for your
life over there, honey.
Well, you know
where your life is?
You're life's waiting
like a God-damned fool
right here for you, man.
And one morning, you're gonna
wake up in, uh, Casablanca,
one of those fancy places.
Honey, you're gonna be
freezing to death, man.
You're gonna wake up and
you'll say, good, good lord,
good, good, good lord.
I just went off
and left that woman
in that great big huge double
bed with that great big fur rug
on top of it and those
satin sheets, man.
What am I doing in
Casablanca, man?
I mean, really, man.
One of these days, that
cat's going to wake
up and say that to himself.
And when he comes back home,
there, just like the Capricorn
that I am, I'll be
standing there waiting.
I said, baby, I
knew one day, hun,
I knew, knew, knew one day.
'Cause you've finally
come on home to me.
Honey, when you walk
in my front door,
I'm gonna be able to tell
by the look in your eyes.
I'll say, good God, that
man finally done got it.
Lord, that man
finally done realized.
So you can put your
head on my shoulder,
baby, yeah, 'cause I know you've
got some more tears to shed.
So come on.
Come on.
Come on.
Come on.
Come on.
Come on and cry, cry, baby.
Cry, baby.
Cry.
Cry.
Oh, baby, cry, baby-
Cry, baby.
Hey, I want to ask about
that tune that you just sang.
It's, um, it's about men.
It's about men?
Did you ever see
those mule carts'?
Yeah.
They, uh, there's a
dumb mule up there,
right, and a long stick
with a string and a carrot
hanging out of it.
And they hang this thing out
in front of the mule's nose,
and he runs after
it all day long.
And who is the man in this
parable, the mule or the person
holding the carrot?
The woman is the
mule, chasing something
that somebody's always teasing.
Constantly chasing a man
who always eludes here.
Well, they just always
hold up something more
than they're prepared to give.
We had dinner one night, and
I remember suddenly saying,
not having planned to,
how- can you assure me
that you're not doing heroin?
And her answer was interesting.
It was, who would care?
It really stopped me.
Do you ever get back
to Port Arthur, Texas?
No, but I'm back in August, man.
And guess what I'm doing?
I don't know, night clubbing?
I'm going to my tenth
annual high school reunion.
Oh, I want to... take movies
and bring them back here
and show us.
Hey, would you
like to go with me?
Well, I don't have
that many friends
in your high school class.
- I don't, either.
- Or mine, for that matter.
I don't either.
Believe me.
You don't, either?
How do you know they
won't move the reunion'?
That's true.
I wasn't going to tell them.
What do you remember
most about Port Arthur?
Uh, I don't really...
Uh, no comment.
Because it was really only
the acceptance of millions
that could make up for that
way that she had grown up.
If everyone loved
her, then it was OK.
But if anyone didn't, they
could destroy her in a minute.
Hi, how were you different
from your schoolmates
when you were in DJ?
I don't know.
Why don't you ask them?
I wonder.
I was they who
made you different?
No, I was...
In other words, you were
different in comparison
to them.
Why Were you?
I felt apart from them.
Did you go to football games?
I don't remember.
Uh, I don't remember.
I think not.
I didn't go to the
high school prom.
Aw, you were asked, weren't you?
No, I wasn't.
They didn't think... I don't
think they wanted to take me.
And I've been... I've been
suffering ever since.
I remember when I was young,
some doctor told my mother
that if I didn't, quote,
"straighten up," quote,
I was going to end up either
in jail or an insane asylum
by the time I was 21.
So when I turned 25 and
my second record came out,
I think my mother sent me
a congratulatory telegram
or something, you know,
that I had escaped the pen.
How do you get along
with your parents?
Pretty good.
They had somewhere to go.
Right, they went to a wedding.
We go along pretty good, yeah.
Did they ever seem
surprised by your success?
I think, yeah, yeah.
Our parents saw it was
challenging to their way
of life, to their
positions in the community,
and it created difficulties
between them and both of them
silently with each
other, feeling that they
had somehow caused a calamity.
I didn't see her for six months.
She had promised me that she
was going to quit heroin,
and she did.
And it changed her.
Dear family, things
are going so well for me.
I have a new, smaller band, and
it's really going fantastic.
I met a really fine man in Rio,
but I had to get back to work.
So he's off finding
the rest of the world,
but he really did love
me and was so good to me.
He wants to come
back and marry me.
I thought I'd die without
someone besides fans asking me,
but he meant it.
And who knows?
I may get tired
of the music biz,
but I'm really
getting it on now.
She called me up and said,
I've got a great new band.
Do you want to come
back on the road?
With Janis, it was magic.
She had a gift from
God when she played.
There was a connection
there that I don't even
know what it was between us.
Somehow, we didn't
really do a lot...
We never did a lot of talking.
She was bubbly person.
She wanted everything to
be so perfect for everyone,
not just her, everyone.
You say that it's over, baby.
You say that it's over, dear.
But still you hang around.
She said, man, with Full Tilt, I
can change something in
the middle of a song,
and they're right there.
She was a fantastic
front person.
She would say, when I do the
windmill, keep her going.
Or we'd be playing a song,
and she would decide she would
like to talk to the audience.
And she would bring
the band down,
and then she would
start talking.
I can't hear ya.
She was working the crowd.
It wasn't just
that she was clean.
She had learned just
about every lesson
to be learned from the really
tough times of the year before.
She was more comfortable
about her whole life.
Having David leave her was
actually really good for her.
She spoke of him afterwards
as her lost love,
and she still
hoped that he would
come back after she got clean.
Hey, make up your mind, honey.
You're playing with me.
David, honey, daddy, listen.
I kicked, man, four months ago.
I'm on the road rocking with a
great group, so get Janis back.
She's delightfully crazy,
but I love her, man.
I've got that picture
of us in Salvador,
and every time I
look at it, I look
like a woman, not a pop star.
But I'm afraid it's too late.
I know how to be a pop star, but
I don't know how to bake bread.
But, honey, when I look at you,
this whole flood comes over me.
I love you, and I did
write, mother fucker.
Don't you yell at me.
It seems to bother a
lot of women's lib people
that you are kind of
so up front sexually.
I haven't
been attacked by anyone yet.
You know, how can
they attack me?
I'm representing everything
they said they want, you know?
It's sort of like you
are what you settle for.
Do you know what I mean?
You are only as much
as you settle for.
And, you know, if they
settle for being somebody's
dishwasher, that's their
own fucking problem.
If you don't settle
for that, and you
keep fighting, you know, you
end up anything you want to be.
I'm just doing what I want
to and what feels right
and not settling for
bullshit, and it works.
How can they be mad at that?
Yeah, one girl I know said,
well, how come she doesn't have
any women in any of her groups?
You show me a
good drummer, and I'll hire one.
You know, show me a good chick.
Besides, I don't want any
chicks on the road with me.
You don't?
I've got
enough competition, man.
No, I like to be around men.
God bless ya, folks.
God bless ya.
It was fun getting
back together with her
on the Festival
Express because we were
all stuck in a little area.
Her yes men couldn't
contain her there.
They couldn't control
her there because she
wanted to get out and be
with her kindred spirits,
the musicians.
Are we in Calgary yet?
We're stopped.
Hey, we're in Alberta.
Alberta?
Alberta.
Alberta, don't let
your hair hang down.
I've loved you ever
sine the day I saw you.
He ain't much of a boxer.
I got to tell you.
Jerry didn't love Janis
because she was a Sports
Illustrated swimsuit model.
He loved her for what she did.
And the sparks
that she threw off,
he had a right proper
appreciation for what Janis was
and what she had to offer.
From the Kentucky coal
mines to the
California sun, Bobby
shared the secrets of my soul.
Her producer gave me a demo
of her singing "Bobby McGee."
It was so exhilarating for me
to hear her make that her song.
If you're a songwriter
and somebody
does that with what you've
got, it's the greatest
feeling in the world.
But I'd trade
all of my tomorrows
for one single
yesterday to be holding
Bobby's body next to mine.
And freedom's just another
word for nothing left to lose,
nothing, that's all
my Bobby left me.
I hear you're
making a new record.
Yeah, and
it's really going good.
I like my producer.
He's really working
out very well with me.
Who's producing it?
Paul Rothchild.
You haven't worked
with him before, huh?
No, no, I haven't.
The first time I talked
to Janis about Paul,
she said, boy, that guy.
And I said, what?
And she started
talking about him.
This is serious Janis, and I had
never heard her say this kind
of stuff about anybody.
She was talking about how much
she was learning from him.
The mood was very up.
I mean, as good as sessions
get, everybody in love
with everybody else and
working very hard, and Janis,
she was always ready
to do the most.
She was a much better singer
than the world, or even she,
knew.
Oh, we knew.
We knew there was
something here.
And that was all, really,
that whole thing was
spontaneous combustion
because she had
an incredible sense of time.
You listen to that stuff,
and like I tell you,
it's like you're breathing.
And the slowing down, and
it's like being in heaven.
What he was asking her
to do was to understand
the different voices
she had at her command.
And the ramifications
for this, for Janis,
were really profound because
she had always said...
And she absolutely
meant it... oh, man.
When I blow out my voice,
I'm going to buy a bar
and retire in Marin County.
What she was learning from Paul
was enabling her to see farther
into the future,
and that's where
Paul was looking all along.
He said, 30 years
from now, I want
you to be making
your best album,
and I want you to be
making it with me.
She called me on the
phone and she said,
I gotta play on
the phone for you
a song of Kris
Kristofferson's that I've just
recorded... to hear that
voice, to hear her pride,
to hear her excitement.
I didn't hear it
till she was gone,
and it was very
emotional for me.
Uh, I could just
hear her saying,
wait till that son of
a bitch hears this.
You know?
You know, everything
about it was
positive for Janis,
except that she
always hated the down hours.
The Janis who says, how
come the guys in the band
go home with these girls and I
go home alone, she was saying,
you can't imagine how
hard it is to be me.
She just didn't know
who to relax with.
She just didn't know, anymore.
A lot of pressure, you've
got to do this, Janis.
You've got to do that.
That's what made it
hard for her, I think.
She loved everybody.
That was the probably.
She was like a little girl
lost, and then she would be
as strong as a mountain lion.
As far as anyone could
see, she had kicked heroin.
She had replaced
it with alcohol,
but it didn't look like
that was going to kill her.
I think she just thought,
one last little, uh, hurrah.
I can understand her wanting to.
You know, oh, no
one's ever gonna know.
I'll hang in my room, do
a hit, and then go to bed.
Paul Rothchild called me,
and he said, Janis isn't here.
Can you see if you can find her?
And I pull out of the driveway,
and I just look up there.
And I know which window
is hers, and there's
a light in the window.
And when I opened the
door, I had this really
simple and direct feeling.
Nobody's here.
I came around the corner and
saw Janis lying by the bed.
But that feeling of nobody
is here, it was right.
I was standing at the stove,
boiling an egg or something.
The radio said,
Janis Joplin, and I
knew before they got the
last consonant in her name
out that she was dead.
And I wrote a telegram to Janis
that says, um, really miss you.
Things aren't the same alone.
I could meet you in
Kathmandu anytime,
but late October
is the best season.
Love you, Mama,
more than you know.
I just fell apart.
I just completely fell apart.
She was in touch
with her own emotions
and who she was in some way
that nobody else that I knew
was that in touch with.
And to be that way,
to try to get that,
that's" that's the
price you pay for doing
that kind of art on that level.
Dear family, I'm awfully
sorry to be such a
disappointment to,
but I really do think there's
an awfully good chance
I won't blow it this time.
There is really nothing
more I can say right now.
Guess I'll write more
when I have more news.
Until then, address all
criticism to the above address.
And please believe that you
can't possibly want for me
to be a winner more than I do.
Love, Janis.
Sit there.
Go on.
Go on and count your fingers.
I know what else, what else,
what have you got to do?
And I know how you
feel, and I know you
ain't got no reason to go on.
I know you feel that
you must be through.
Go on and sit right back down.
I want you to count.
Count your fingers, my
unhappy, my unlucky,
but my little, my girl blue.
I know you're unhappy.
Oh, hun, I know, babe, I
know just how you feel.
I thought I might share with you
some comments made from some
of the people who loved her.
Dearest family, although
I never ever met Janis,
she was my best friend
in this whole world.
Janis was a beautiful
person because she always
put everything she
had into her music.
She was and always will be
the mother of the blues.
Words fail me now.
Nevertheless, I am
very, very sorry.
Women were way ballsier
then than they are now,
and Janis was fearless with
her pain and with her truth.
And that was one of the most
inspiring things for me,
watching her, going, OK.
I don't need to be anything
other than who I am.
To perform that way with
those lyrics and those songs,
and to feel there's
no lie in it,
it is like... you might as well
be slashing yourself on stage
and opening your skin.
She, like, took a flag and
made a place in rock and roll
for women.
She was the first to really
feel that crazy light of what
rock and roll was at the time.
I know if you knew Janis
Joplin well, or if you...
She sent me a birthday
tape on my birthday.
Last birthday, Yoko asked
all different people
to make a tape for me.
And she was one of
them, and we got it.
After she died, it
arrived in the post.
And she was singing happy
birthday to me in the studio.
What do you think could be
done about drug overdosing,
in or out of the
profession of music?
Well, I think the
basic thing nobody asked
is why do people take
drugs of any sort,
from alcohol to
aspros to hard drugs.
I mean, is there something wrong
with society that's making us
so pressurized that we
cannot live in it without
guarding ourselves against it?