Hack! (2007)

First Aid Kit.
A real classic, huh?
I suppose so.
- I always loved movies.
Believe it or not, but I saw
"A Clockwork Orange"
is only for the first time.
I think he shows the violence
of humanity in our society.
Do you not?
What is the rush on, Tim?
I am not Mr. Argento.
You watch it.
Silent but deadly.
- Keep the finger, asshole.
Keep the finger, asshole.
You know?
You're right.
What then, Johnny?
'A Clockwork Orange. "
Kubrick at his best.
I know that car parts are not good.
What was that?
Goodbye.
Bitch.
Come on, cowboy.
What is it, kamergenootje?
- Hello.
What do we do tonight, Brain?
- What we do every night, Pinky.
Trying to take over the world.
I wish you was a girl.
Do we not both?
So you go too, huh?
- What?
With this crazy trip.
- Absolutely. I want to succeed.
I have my game bird rate increase.
Yes, it is only 4.1.
- It is 4.6.
Keep your calm, but I joke about it.
You know we love you.
Of course I know that my wives.
That I mean.
Maddy.
What are you selling?
More lottery raffle?
Also good morning.
I've never done.
What is that?
He went hunting
but apparently no one knows where.
I have a bad feeling.
Well.
Anything.
- What?
Do you have your big,
white already caught.
- Rot op.
Excuse me.
Hello, are you Captain JT Bates?
I'm Emily of St Frolic University.
We rented your boat for Bear Island.
I think it is a beautiful trip, I...
- Come on board.
Well.
Thank you.
Johnny, here.
My God.
- Great.
That is the leap bitch.
Try to miss me too much.
- I will try.
But I survive it.
Have fun.
We have a larger boat is needed.
Hello.
It will be fun.
- You have everything, huh?
I am an assistant in the biologieles.
Mr. Argento thought...
Potvolkoffie.
What a language.
Thanks, Johnny.
- No problem.
Ice tea?
- Great.
That is beautiful.
Cold hands.
- Warm hearts.
Where are the students?
- In a few hours.
I'm even a little nervous.
'Great power brings
great responsibility. "
Spiderman.
How can your pockets for a filmles?
Movies.
I wanted an easy A.
- Is that not done? Unbelievable.
Please.
- One of the reasons that
I am in this biology thing, my figure
to increase, so I can play football.
So all in red.
I'm professional.
The Steelers follow me al
That's great, Tim.
Thank you.
Emily, what is your favorite film,
next to "A Clockwork Orange"?
'Pretty Woman'.
- 'The Exorcist', without doubt.
You like horror movies.
- "Glitter" I was horror.
'Hellraiser' is the best.
Favorite killer: Jason, Freddy,
Hannibal Lecter or Michael Myers?
Should you not return to
your yellow van?
Yes, your mama.
I think Hannibal the cannibal,
that eat brains and stuff.
No, that guy in 'Saw'.
First Aid Kit.
Plagiarism.
The real monsters are the classics.
'Nosferatu', aka 'Dracula'.
The werewolf, the mummy.
The essence of the black lagoon.
How old are you, girl?
Sixty or seventy?
Old enough to me to dress stylishly.
- As in 'The little house on the prairie?
It is all right.
Frankenstein Best Film.
I love Frankenweenie.
- I think I like.
Otherwise, the dog.
- I talk about the dog, big dog.
Best Actor Frankenstein.
- Boris Karloff.
- Kill me.
Peter Boyle in?
- 'Young Frankenstein', 1974.
Mel Brooks is the director.
- Can I agree?
Fantastic that you are here.
Action.
Can you do something for me?
Can you go back a bit?
As you come of the boat?
We just come from the boat.
- I am an inspired filmmaker.
Well, we go.
You have heard the lady.
Remember that we are guests.
You have my better half but forgive.
She is quite keen on her art.
Action.
Well. Only the boat.
Hello. I'm Tony Argento.
We talked on the phone.
Captain Ahab. Favorite movie?
'Jaws'.
The best film ever made.
Great.
That is great.
Come on.
Thank you.
I am Mary Shelley.
- Mary Shelley?
My father loved her books.
So I got her name and
my passion for films of my father.
Let's you install.
Girls, follow me.
She said girls.
It's fun.
Do you mind?
Take your chance.
You are all
such beautiful young ladies.
I take a bath.
- No. We have about getost.
And, cut.
Fantastic.
Great introduction.
I see you soon.
- It is a very interesting woman.
Yes, as a desperate housewife on XTC.
A what?
A nice girl.
Perhaps I need to decorate.
Someday maybe.
- It is good, Mr. King.
Come on, I'm not as old.
My father was Mr. King. I'm Vincent.
Install yourself
and we see each other over for dinner.
Okay, V.
This is something for
'Queer Eye for the Straight Guy. "
What?
- Nothing.
Have them here 'Psycho' filmed?
From here there is no reception.
Nobody is perfect, but...
- This model is beautiful.
Halogen lighting, double vision,
each area worked against fungi,
color corrections
and even hardening agents.
Flatwork Substances, huh?
Maybe I need a microscope.
I will call himself Captain Bates.
He can just pick up.
He is usually reliable.
- That would be good. Thanks, Vince.
Sure, Freddie.
Here's your room.
Stew.
What a mess.
- Nice, I think.
Very good.
Where is Mr. Argento back?
- I think tomorrow morning.
What a layabout.
That looks beautiful.
Italian, right?
- Absolutely.
Porcile, I saw him
in the Salt Lake Film Festival
I huiverde of luck.
When I saw my Vinnie
for the first time.
And we fell for each other.
It was love, huh?
Tomorrow is a big day, huh?
We begin to
on the south coast.
We observe invertebrates
in the tidal pools.
I will provide breakfast.
- Thank you, Mary Shelley.
A nice house here.
Very Ralph Lauren.
Thank you. I
My father inherited.
His heart stopped.
That very sorry.
He was a great guy,
a decorated war hero.
Everyone should agree, but
we are already in our sky.
It is 28 square kilometers,
6 miles wide and 10 kilometers long.
It was formerly a hunting club.
Not anymore.
No, it's the perfect place
to schools on the mainland to help.
Like you.
Here live many animals in the wild.
So many that poachers are.
Poachers?
As with guns?
Do you worry about.
Usually they are out of sight.
Real men, it's nothing
you to worry about it.
It is not particular.
- No problem for us, huh guys.
A question, V.
- Yes, Q.
My phone does not work. Is there a telephone?
- No, but we have telephone, if necessary.
Hurry you. I want to go to the beach.
- It's all right.
I'm so gone.
- I do not mind.
You go for it, girlfriend.
Let us discuss our plans.
Blowjob, penis lips.
Hairy balls.
Well, tomorrow we are to half past four,
we eat and make two groups,
Group A and Group B.
Remember your biology notes not.
You catch good balls.
- Will you be my trainer?
Excuse me.
I have enough of this nonsense.
What?
If you did not want to study,
had you not to come.
I am here also evaluated.
Hold on. Come on.
She is right. Now Argento is not there,
who can best organize?
If we start around seven o'clock?
Relax friend.
Then we made early
and we can party all night.
I can live with.
Since you are friends,
Q, Maddy, Ricky, you are group A.
Tim, Sylvia, Emily and I are Group B
Good for me.
- Yes.
Hands up.
Well, time for a game.
- What?
Listen, nature mad.
Well.
If my rock
eight times clashes on the water,
all girls show their tits.
What did you say?
- And if he is no time conflict?
Then he strips to his briefs
and the water running. - Ten seconds.
That you would like to, huh.
Well, I lost anyway.
I participate.
Come on, Emily.
This is your chance
to show what you have.
No, thanks.
- The boy has already GT.
GT.
No tits.
That you will never know.
- Who has it?
Slick.
- Well, do we.
Come on.
- Come on, suckers.
One, two, three, four, five.
Come on, buddy. I have five.
- Strip.
Thousand.
Two.
Three.
- Faster.
Well.
Thousand.
Two...
That looks like a woman in panties.
There is more wind came.
- Yes.
You're crazy, man.
There was something in the water.
Poor baby.
- Small Timmetje.
Klein Timmetje.
The water was very cold.
Bastards.
- You piemeltje is so cute.
Stop it.
I am very cold.
- Come.
Believe me.
Well.
I have my hose emptying.
If you can find him.
- That I would not start.
So, Billy Elliot, how long
have you been a fag?
As long as you have a small sausage.
The water was cold.
For a lulzuiger trap you so bad.
- Really?
You will not nichterig
start doing, sir quarterback.
Mr quarterback.
With your little one.
- Shut up, dude.
Shut up.
Funny though, it was cold.
Damn.
- Now I have you.
Stop it.
Bear.
I had actually
own kids.
It's always fun to practice.
Have you seen my camera?
- No, Poeffie, why?
I had him just yet.
I do not know
I have left him.
As Krusty the clown?
- No he was not Krusty the clown.
Probably Captain Spaulding.
Captain who?
- Spaulding.
'House of 1000 corpses'?
Come on, Rob Zombie.
Not personally, but
what do you Tim?
He is a jerk.
But he is a handsome boy,
with a beautiful body.
Yours is not ugly, sister.
- Thanks, Maddy.
Yes, Tim is handsome,
but he is an empty head.
I would not marry him,
I just want sex with him.
Hopefully.
But still.
Come on.
Even you must satisfy your desires
with someone,
or something.
Good night.
Relax, man.
- You have not seen that thing.
You've clearly gehallucineerd.
- My stuff is good, it is not.
That damn clown playing me parts.
Sleep well, men.
Do you hear that?
What?
Guest.
- That is disgusting.
You're bad, man.
- What have you eaten? Monkey Ass?
It started, guys.
The whole night.
- Shut up.
Hello.
She loves that camera.
I would like to shoot her,
My one-eyed monster.
Monster?
Did you, monster?
No.
- Have fun you guys.
Please show some respect.
Kiss me, Mary Shelly.
- My God, who raised you?
Until later.
We come back here for two hours.
Mr. Argento will be back.
Well, group A and group B.
We go.
Very well, peperkop.
Sheriff.
Damn, Radley.
Why do you always?
But, sir...
- Enough.
JT is back?
- No, sir.
We have heard nothing more
of Captain Bates nor the Orca.
I am a moment.
I gotta pee.
Stay with the boat.
- All right, Sheriff.
He is heavy.
He went this direction.
- Excuse me, I have not seen him.
Would you like something to drink?
- Maybe next time, keep you well.
Bear.
Think you what I think?
Action.
We call our school
'Around the ocean. "
Well found.
Sylvia and I are looking
to native plant species.
We want to help.
Well.
You know?
You can do it.
The first time you saw, I...
As you go through.
Are you ready to take the rest to see?
Do you need help, dear?
Yeah, baby.
What they are doing to you?
Nature study.
I do not have much experience.
Absolutely not. I...
I'm still...
I mean, I've never...
you know.
- It's the same with me.
Really?
- Yes. It is not always what it seems.
Apparently.
Honey.
- Come on.
It is nice to be popular.
Have you seen Tim and Sylvia?
- No, why?
They are already missing hours.
- It will be okay.
Can I just use your phone?
- Sure.
Too bad your friends are not there,
to enjoy the meal.
And your teacher too.
Mr. Argento had his back.
- So much more is there for us.
Glad you keep films.
- It's always been a passion.
- Ever since I was a boy,
not true, Miss Moneypenny.
My Vinnie likes the classics,
especially the narrow,
such as' The Birds'.
My favorites? Documentaries.
Then you have something
in common with Emily.
She also likes the old stay.
Really?
And the rest of you?
Keep you from horror films?
Usually they are boring,
unrealistic and predictable.
And my brothers always die first.
- Not always.
I love rancidity, many,
of bloody entrails.
Bitch in style.
Are you back to your fold?
- Certainly not.
The phone line is again defective.
- This is a classic in horror films.
"The bridge is flooded.
You will have to stay overnight.
This is one of those things that happen
if you live here.
But it's worth it.
- Definitely.
A new recipe.
Please.
Who's next?
Stay safe and protect little Johnny.
- Wear a raincoat.
Got something to smoke?
For insanity,
here we are.
I stopped, Maddy.
- You have nothing.
No.
- It is ironic.
After all these years that people say
how bad it is,
there is a clown necessary
to let you stop.
Laugh with yourself.
I always say that. Right, Brain?
- Yes, Pinky.
This is for you.
My God. Stop smoking it.
You breathe it stinks.
It is dirty.
Where did you grow up?
- In Benton, but born in Syracuse.
And you?
- In Maine.
In a small town, no future
so we went to the west.
Better?
- Much better.
This is a nice place, huh?
- Fantastic.
What is that?
Probably a poacher.
Hello, baby.
Carry, it's the Q. Hello.
Can you hear me now?
Honey? Can you hear me now?
Damn.
If the damn fool is not.
We saw just a poacher.
- Really? Q is still not back.
Where is he going?
He went into his bitch call.
- Do what?
Crack, mouse, flamoes...
If I were you I would some loosening.
I will try to be more vulgar,
especially for you.
That would be fantastic.
Maybe he is injured,
cases or something.
Should we call anyone?
- Who? Charlie's Angels?
We are on a fucking island.
- It's all right. Jesus.
This is truly bizarre.
Maybe he forgot, or something?
- Tim? His ball forgotten?
Now we find Q anymore.
- And here is the ball of Tim, no Tim.
Is there something wrong?
- Yes, there is a student missing?
It seems a strange episode
of 'Survivor'. - Or 'The Twilight Zone.'
Remember that episode
with Burgess Meredith,
where the last living man,
with his glasses, he should just...
- Let now this.
I know that you are concerned.
There is certainly a logical explanation.
We saw someone in a boat.
- It is perhaps a poacher.
Enough with the fucking camera.
- Now is not the moment.
Okay.
But you should not be common.
Is there no way
for someone to contact us?
Unfortunately, no.
What if there is an emergency?
An accident?
We should never worry.
Usually, the phone.
It will do.
- We had better go to sleep now.
If no one pops up tonight,
we find it tomorrow.
People, trust me.
Perhaps Q is really lost.
And Sylvia and Tim are left
us without warning?
What are we doing?
I suggest for a gang.
- Madison?
What?
I try to lift everyone.
Come on, guys.
You are so talented.
Steven Spielberg nothing,
compared with you.
You are geiler than Lara Croft.
It is unimaginable.
And we fit together so nicely.
Come on.
Maybe we should wait
until the morning.
I can not sleep.
- Me neither.
We have a plan.
We make two groups.
Groepie groepie?
- We are stronger if we stay together.
That is so.
- I know that we are stronger.
But then we can
double territory search.
Let me guess.
You stay with Johnny?
Bitch.
They are always set
in these films.
Did you miss me?
Here is a look I am never tired.
This is nature at its best.
Hang on.
It looks like a scene
from a bad horror movie.
Say that.
God, there.
- What? Where?
You're a bad whore.
- So you love me.
It must have been what
for everyone to get here.
What do you mean?
On this excursion.
The students wrote in.
They sent in an application.
Like you.
There are altogether
between different characters.
It seems
a collection typetjes.
- That is true. - The athlete
who likes his muscles shows.
The hot exchange student.
- So hot she is not.
We have one of the black ghetto,
an extravagant Asian, a metal girl,
and a smart, beautiful,
very hot young lady,
even glasses wear.
That was...
That was extraordinary.
I thought you handsome
Clark Gable or Cary Grant character was.
They are perfectly cast.
But what?
It is the Sheriff.
Mr. King.
Mrs. King.
What is going on here?
I asked you, madam.
I asked you, madam.
Here's Johnny.
Cut.
End of scene.
Okay, Bear. We need more.
It is a busy night.
And you have another boat to sink.
- I immediately begin to treasure.
It is stuck.
Asshole.
Films requires that unexpected
hurdles to be taken.
Yes, darling.
Yes.
This is cruel.
Q is probably somewhere smoking
and destroy laugh. - Maybe.
Where are you?
He takes us in the leg.
What a Bullshit.
You're right, we go.
I need to pee.
You're so feminine.
- Certainly not.
Stay in the neighborhood.
- You can call me a clean sweep,
if you want.
It is tempting.
My God, girl.
That is a long pond turn.
Come on, Maddy.
This is not funny.
Not funny.
Who's there?
Perhaps only verzwikt Q
or something.
We found him.
I have an odd feeling.
Did you do that?
Here is something wrong.
I think it is fine.
Stay the fuck away from me.
Touch me and I speak a curse from
you dick of decline.
Stop with that kind of
dirty talk, girl.
Or I take Mr. McGregor
and save your unconscious.
I mean it, asshole.
I mean it, damn it.
If you do not talk to the man
you are going to release.
Promise?
My word like a drunkard
with a kilt, as man of the sea.
On my honor as a highlander.
Believe me, girl.
I am not the person,
which you should be concerned.
If you have not noticed,
the people here
as crazy as a door.
Listen, I have a boat
on the other side of the island.
Go to it and wait there.
I'll pick your friends.
At least, if they are still alive.
He is fast, huh?
- Yes.
So let us organize.
Why filming nothing extra.
Maybe B-roll.
- Now we are still here.
Bear, you're good.
- Yes?
I love you.
I love my Vincent.
Bear, I was just scared.
We found no one during the night.
- We must not stop.
What was that?
- What was what?
I'm not sure.
Put you down.
We will be safe. Good?
I am a moment.
- Safe? Johnny?
Great.
It is not good. I have...
This can not be real.
Your karate is a joke.
My Vinnie likes the classics.
As' The Birds'.
Are you okay?
That bastard made me afraid.
Listen. Ok.
We should really go.
Good?
You like that?
Fantastic.
I can only 'wow' say
what a great performance.
Thanks, Uncle Vincent.
- You have not told me
that the Chinese martial arts had.
- That I did not know, and he is Korean.
It was not in his report.
This university has already
disappointed me in many areas.
Poor Aunt Mary Shelley.
It is all right.
If you die while doing something
what you love
it is your life
not been worthless.
Now is the time for the last section.
Jesus.
What did you fear a hare.
Where did you go?
I walk around in circles.
I missed you.
Wil je
my glasses further decline?
Of course.
Wil je me, Johnny?
Here on the ground and now a moment?
Let's be naughty.
Is everything good with you?
It can not be better, Johnny Rocket.
Show me your gun.
Are you ready for the explosion?
- What are you smoking, girl?
I thought we had the sex scene.
- I am of the opinion changed.
Good, good.
Young lady, I am still your guardian.
And I am responsible
to your mother, if you want to or not.
But you had promised.
Monkey still love you.
And I love you, monkey.
I miss Mary Shelley.
- With three, it was very nice.
That was so.
Wake up.
Wake up.
Johhny, be wa...
My head.
What stinks here?
Where am I?
- It makes no sense.
Those bastards make a snuff film,
and we play the leading role.
- What are you talking about?
A horror movie reality.
I heard them say to Cannes,
perfect for the French.
It's disgusting.
- You are just out.
Is that Mr. Argento?
Christ.
- They make horror movies after.
Damn.
Emily took care of the cast
and brought us all here.
Your girlfriend has mad it up.
- She is not my girlfriend.
My God, is that "Hellraiser"?
'The Texas Chainsaw Massacre "?
'Th3rteen Ghosts?
This may not be true.
Is that Mary Shelley?
Not 'The Birds'.
They think they are artists,
but they lack originality.
Damn.
Let me guess.
My feet were on?
I was almost forgotten.
There are also disturbed fish
in the water.
Damn.
Oh, damn, dirty sky
What's going on?
Who are you?
- The people here call me Willy.
Liberated us, Willy.
There are the keys.
You got it, girl.
My boat is on the south coast.
I get you here. Come on.
Hurry. Get me out of here.
Calm down, girl.
Do I look like the Great Houdini?
Stop. You is not in the scenario.
Improvising it, Emily.
And action.
The whole world is an arena
and all men and women
but actors.
You're bad.
They are right, girl.
You are really bad.
In fact, in all these years, this
Shakespeare the worst I ever saw.
I will give you two thumbs down
be given.
That is not fair.
Anyone can give criticism.
Sylvia, no.
Now she is not so hot, huh?
That is not correct.
You are mine, literally.
- Not today, Vince.
That was not good.
I stood in front of the...
That hurts.
- Wait a minute, Uncle Vincent.
Uncle?
Damn.
No more friendly.
As you know, Emily.
Films
the largest export product of America.
No horror movie has ever
loss, they say anyway.
And now reality shows
more and more popular.
We have the perfect product.
Let your friend skinning.
Alive.
Bravo.
You are both crazy.
You are both crazy.
The word is talented.
You have killed everyone,
to make a stupid movie?
This is not a silent film.
Was Jack Frost or Ghost Dad stupid?
Certainly not, you stupid idiot.
It calls it art.
Some people continue to live.
Something that you can
and never will understand.
This movie sucks
will not continue to live.
You do better the Charles Manson Fanclub.
You too, psycho bitch.
Look at my mouth,
damn Johnny Rocket.
The truth is that you
disturbed family values have.
The truth?
You can use the truth to.
Everything you do is a clich.
You're a copycat.
This could be your title,
"The imitator. Idiot.
What do you think of this,
amateur asshole.
This is for you, olifantenman.
- What...
He started on my nerves.
Are you gonna murder me now?
- You learn quickly, Einstein.
Too bad you have to die.
You were great in this movie.
I thought we had something?
I wanted you.
But now I want you mootjes heels.
Jump in the boat.
Pretend you grow.
- That does not seem real.
Do it.
- Good. Relax.
Favorite movie, and no lies.
Rowing simply.
Mine is' Dead Calm '.
In 1989, with Nicole Kidman,
Sam Neill, Billy Zane.
Beautiful film.
With a beautiful ending.
A nice end, but predictable.
I thought you...
Where I come from,
piranha's eating them.
Dear Mary and Joseph.
What is going on here?
Barslechte a horror movie.
And hopefully without sequel.
It is unimaginable.
We fit so well together.
It must have been what
for everyone to get here.
What do you mean?
Believe me, girl.
I am not the person,
which you should be concerned.
Bear?
And action.
En actie.