1
My father used to tell
me about the wilderness.
He said it's a place where
all things go to live,
and all things go to die.
A place for wonder.
A place for fear.
My father said each man's
wilderness is his own.
It's alive in us.
Charm!
Where you going, man?
Hey charm!
Restless.
Waiting.
Cory!
He found
time, even at that tender age,
to pay his tailor's bill
properly, and to fold his
trousers with the same crease
every night so that he always
looked neat and dignified.
Strange to say, he
made no friends.
Perhaps he was just a thought
too perfect
for a district like the five
towns.
Do you have a headache?
Elliot's gonna die.
What do you mean?
Elliot.
My hamster.
This is a threat, Abigail.
It's not...
Are you kidding me?
This isn't a threat.
You know him.
He's having a rough time.
It's only been six months.
That's not an excuse.
Your son punched
my kid in the face.
Look, maybe this homeschooling
thing just isn't working.
Maybe if he actually
socialized...
Oh, excuse me?
Don't go there.
You have no idea what
you're talking about, and...
I really don't even know
it's that big of a deal.
I don't understand why
he would run from him.
Did you write this?
James, this is not right.
James.
You can't go around telling
people that they're going to die.
It's not cool!
I'm not trying to be cool.
You're scheduled to
see Walter tomorrow.
You can discuss it with him.
Of course, let him deal with me.
Come on Elliot.
Come on dude.
Let me out...
Turn we then to the
one proper masthead.
That of a whale-ship at sea.
Lost in the infinite
series of sea...
Nothing ruffled but the waves.
Straining along the deep...
While beneath you swim
the hugest of monsters.
There's a wolf in me.
Fangs pointed for
tearing gashes.
A red tongue for raw meat.
There's a hog in me.
A snout and a...
Did you know turquoise
isn't from Turkey?
What?
Your ring.
It was actually traded in
turkish bazaars, but it was
found in Iran.
I know a lot about turquoise.
Great.
Yeah.
What happened to your face?
I was kicked by a mule.
A mule?
Big fat one.
James?
Dr. Pembry's ready for you.
Hm.
Your shoes, Walter.
Huh?
They're ridiculous.
Why are my shoes so
important, James?
Well, they're not important to
me, but they should be to you.
Why?
Well...
For all you know
they could be...
Lifting a piano to the
fourth floor as we speak.
And then you step outside, a
cable snaps, and then boom.
Dead.
In those hideous shoes.
Is that how I'm going to go?
Death by piano?
Is that what you believe?
And what about...
You also know how he's
going to croak, right?
Hm?
You know, that's unprofessional.
To do that during a session.
Well, I heard you were
officially accepted to
St. Helen's.
The freak school?
It's not a freak school.
Some of the most gifted young
people in the world have
studied there.
At the freak school
in the mountains.
Well, it's normal to be scared
or anxious to go to a
new school.
Mm, I'm not scared.
Really?
Really, and this is a waste
of my time, because I'm
not going.
Might be good to
meet some new people.
James...
I don't want to talk about it.
Alright, how about
your father then?
Let's talk about your dad.
You went to visit his
grave the other day?
James?
Uh...
I'm going to excuse
myself to the restroom.
Hey.
You're so busted.
Huh?
Where you going?
I'm leaving.
Looks more like escaping.
Maybe.
Where are you escaping to?
Uh, home?
That's not very ambitious.
Uh, I don't have
anywhere else to go.
I gotta go.
So, how did it go?
Did you two talk about school?
James?
Earth to James!
Huh?
St. Helen's.
Did you and Walter
talk about it?
I have a headache.
This could be really good.
It's an honor you got in.
They're really impressed.
I really want you to
look at the web site.
They're super progressive.
They've got specialty studies
on music theory and gothic
literature.
Philosophy...
I have to stop by the shop
and pick up a few things.
There's a wolf in me.
Fangs pointed for
tearing gashes.
A red tongue for raw meat.
I keep this wolf because the
wilderness gave it to me.
And I cannot let it go.
James?
What did you do to Elliot?
What?
What...
What did you do to him?
I didn't do anything.
What?
You think I killed him?
I need my notebook.
I'm not kidding, James. This
is...
I didn't kill him!
James, talk...
Stop!
You smell like wine.
There's a baboon in me.
It lives inside my head.
Clawing and yapping.
I roam in the dark.
Going God knows where.
Excuse me, but...
Haven't I seen you before?
By the north oak clinic,
you were playing the piano?
Did you give me a dollar?
No, I-I didn't.
Oh, well shit I must not have
been that good then, huh?
No.
No, I...
I just couldn't.
Well then shit, you owe
me a dollar then, huh?
Yeah.
I'm fucking with you, man.
I'm joking.
I'm harmon.
James... charm.
Alright James charm.
Do you know Frederic chopin?
Chopin?
You usually ride around the
bus at night talking about
chopin?
James charm.
Who's this?
That is James charm.
What are you wearing?
Just my clothes.
I like it.
Thanks.
Is she, like, your girlfriend?
Me and gunny.
No.
Well, sometimes she's into
dudes, but mostly girls.
So, where you going, charm?
I...
I dunno.
You wanna come with
us, string bean?
Woo!
Where are we going?
Ain't nowhere we're going, man.
What's up, man!
Hey!
What is he doing?
You know that girl?
Kind of.
N-not really.
I think she hates me.
Well see, if you
think she hates you,
she probably likes you.
So you're good.
Go talk to her.
Go on, go talk to her.
Do you work here?
Yeah.
What's that?
It's a pink sugar elephant.
And yeah, it hurt.
Uh, I-I don't
think I asked that.
Probably were about to.
No, I'm just curious as to why
you have a little elephant.
I don't know why.
Getting kind of
emotional about it.
Excuse me?
I didn't mean to offend you.
I'm actually very fond of them.
E-elephants.
God, you're weird.
So why are you even here?
What do you mean?
I've never seen you here before.
Pretty sure you're stalking me.
I'm...
I'm wanted for hamster murder.
Yo man, we're out.
What?
The game.
This is...
Val.
I'm val.
I'm harmon.
Okay.
Okay.
Come on, string bean.
I guess I gotta go.
Alright, I'll see ya.
See ya.
What is this place?
You live here?
Sort of, man, it's...
It's the cave, you know?
It's a mess in here right now.
So you're a...
You're in a band, right?
Sometimes.
Who's this?
Oh yeah, my bad.
We don't have any
chopin in here, okay?
That's too bad.
Yeah, it is too bad.
How'd you get that?
I told this kid I knew
when he was going to die.
Say what?
I told this kid I knew when
he was going to die and he
punched me in the face.
I'd probably punch
you in the face too.
Yeah.
So I mean, h-how would you
know when he was going to die?
I just know.
You just know.
Yes.
I mean, shit, do you know
when I'm going to die?
It doesn't quite work like that.
How does it work?
I can't explain it.
I'm kind of cursed.
That's some dark shit, James.
You need to tell that
to some girls, for real.
Are you teasing me?
No.
Dead serious.
Tell some girls about that shit.
I'm serious.
So you actually believe me?
Why not, man?
For you, man.
Baby lungs.
Ai-ya!
Good morning.
Hey.
I thought you were
still sleeping.
Um, I got up early to find
a place to bury Elliot.
Oh.
Where?
Um...
The, near the arboretum.
Like by the scarecrow.
Will you please let me
know if you're going out?
Yeah.
Hello?
What are you doing?
You're going to have
to pay for that.
You know I was just
kidding, right?
What's that one?
That's the blood-filled
voodoo doll.
Chocolate frosting, raspberry
jam filling, and a pretzel
stake in its heart.
Heh.
Tang-fastic, vanilla
frosting and tang.
And tang?
Tang, like the drink.
Doesn't look like a drink.
You've never heard of tang?
Interesting.
I-I'm...
I got this for you.
Hey, wait a second.
What is this?
It's a store address.
Be there tomorrow at four.
Anyone here?
H-hello?
Hello?
James charm!
Harmon?
What are you doing man?
I thought you guys
would be in here.
James charm!
We gotta go meet up with gunny.
Cool?
Jesus...
What happened last night?
I don't know, man.
Did you get in trouble?
Not yet.
I think my mom's going
to kill me though.
What about your dad?
He passed away.
What about your
parents, or whatever?
I don't have parents, man.
Heads up, man.
Jesus.
Come on.
String bean, get
one of them man.
Grab from the top, they, they,
then shuffle.
That's it, gunny?
Three each.
For free?
No.
There's a fox in me.
We dart through the night.
We circle and loop
and double-cross.
We thrive.
Woo!
What the fuck.
Who steals ham?
Grabbed it.
Huh?
Grabbed it. It was in the
moment.
Hey, yo.
The other day...
I was like tripping,
out of my mind.
And there was a spider web.
It was like...
The biggest spider web you
have ever fucking seen.
This moth flew right
in the middle of it.
So I'm watching this guy
fight and struggle, and he's
struggling like crazy.
Sure enough, a gnarly-ass
spider starts coming over,
trying to eat this
thing, and I'm like
"I have to save this guy."
I can't help him, you know?
Because I can't mess
with what's going on.
Like it's so much bigger
than me, I know that.
Struggling and struggling
this whole time.
Breaks free.
He breaks free, he's out
of the web, he's good.
But he had used up all his
strength, so all he could do
was really drift
and fall and land.
And in that split
moment, I shit you not...
No lie.
Frog turns up, Bam, done.
He eats that dude.
No!
It's breakfast.
And all of that meant nothing,
like, all that struggling and
fighting meant nothing.
That's horrible.
That's a horrible story.
Not, I guess, if you're a frog.
I guess it's good for the frog.
Yeah, I guess.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait...
Is this some
chick's handwriting?
That girl val wants to meet
up to morrow, but I'm...
Yo, you either go meet up with
her or I'm gonna meet
up with her.
I gotta go anyway.
I, I think I'm wasted.
You better go find her, James.
Jesus.
Where have you been?
Out.
We've been out looking
for you all night.
Are you drunk?
Answer me!
Have you been drinking?
You're gonna lecture me?
On drinking?
Are you fucking my mom?
James!
No. I...
Are you?
I'm gonna go now.
I'll see you tomorrow at work.
Okay.
Thank you.
Later, Gabe.
Ooh!
One of these days you're going
to wake up and realize the
world doesn't revolve
around only you.
You came!
Come here.
Hey, can I see the ring?
Do you want to try it on?
Yes.
Try it.
I keep getting dizzy.
You're getting dizzy on a bus?
Yeah.
I don't usually get...
Whoa!
You know when people
make wishes on, um...
Dandelions?
No, not dandelions.
Stars?
It's hilarious because the
star they're wishing on is
like...
Probably dead.
So what is this place?
Place I used to
come with my dad.
What does he do?
He's a firefighter.
That's awesome.
So do you have, like...
A disorder or something?
Like...
Sorry, why, why
do you, why were you at the
clinic?
My parents separated
when I was 11.
And after that I just started
getting into a lot of fights.
Fights?
I went to this catholic school
with like a thousand bitches,
and they thought
I was weird, so...
That's a lot of bitches.
I just thought it
would be super dramatic to
down a bottle of pills
in the girl's bathroom.
I had to get my stomach
pumped and my dad flipped.
You tried to kill yourself?
Kind of.
Why do you go to the clinic?
My dad died, and my mom
doesn't think I'm
"socially adjusted."
Okay, string bean!
You have to what?
I have to pee.
Ah, bathroom's over there.
What?
What?
What happened?
Nothing.
Okay.
It's not, it's not like that.
I gotta show you something.
Wow.
That's amazing.
Did you make that?
Yeah.
I know you dig that chopin.
I'm glad you like it though.
A work in progress, you know?
I love it.
Good, 'cause you're the first
person I've played it for.
Pull!
Woo!
Give him one.
Pull!
Are you sure?
Miss!
I'm...
I'm going to St. Helen's.
I'm actually very excited
to, to go to the academy.
Just like that, change of heart?
Just like that.
Why do you come here, James?
What do you mean?
I mean why do you come here?
All the hours, all
the sessions...
Why?
'Cause my mom makes me.
Your mom can't make
you do anything.
But that's funny.
No.
I think you come here because
there's a part of you that
feels guilty.
What are you talking about?
Maybe it's your mom.
Maybe it eats at you that
she's had to go to hell and
back just like you.
Even though you'd never
admit that to her, no.
Did you know I knew your father?
You didn't.
I never told you that.
When I taught at
tabor he was there.
Big guy.
Tall.
Quiet.
And you know something?
You're nothing like him.
So, you can keep going
on where you're going.
Or you can deal with it.
Fuck!
No, s-stop!
Stop!
Man, chill!
Come on, buddy.
Come on.
Yo.
Come on man.
Come on man, chill out, okay?
Chill out!
Chill out, just...
Mm.
I don't think I like cigarettes.
Then don't smoke.
Hey.
Think somebody's
here to see you.
Hey.
I've been looking for you.
Oh, shit.
Yeah.
Listen, I'm really sorry
about the other night.
I was messed up and I wasn't
thinking, and I was, it was...
My dad killed himself.
He...
Jumped off the vista bridge
and it really fucked me up.
I'm really sorry.
I have to go.
I'm not mad at you.
Mom.
I didn't have the vision
that Elliot was going to die.
What do you mean?
I read somewhere that...
That when hamsters stop
eating, usually they're sick
or...
They're probably dying.
I just made a, an
educated prediction.
And I don't know when
Cory is gonna die.
He's just a jerk.
Okay.
Mom...
I need to tell you something
that I've never
told anyone before.
I saw it.
You saw what?
Dad.
I saw him do it.
I was awake that night.
I saw him leave.
So I went after him.
He didn't see me.
I was hidden behind the trees.
T-the way he did
it was remarkable.
No hesitation.
No standing on the
ledge thinking.
He just walked right up, took
a deep breath, and fell over.
I'm not lying.
I'm sorry.
I never told anybody.
It's so different when
you say it out loud.
I don't even need to say that
there's not a day when I
don't wake up and think
over every single...
Thing in my head that happened.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
My father used to tell
me about the wilderness.
He said it's alive in us.
Restless.
Waiting.
This is the wilderness
my father left behind.
But it is not mine.